Monday, June 22, 2009

He Gets Me

Things have been a little dodgy with my husband and I for a week or so. I, as usual, opened my over-sized mouth and uttered a comment or three that should have remained unspoken... he, as usual, got all distant, quiet and broody while maintaining that everything was just fine.

We spent a quiet weekend together, eyeing each other warily from across rooms. Saturday night, after a busy day, we went for a long walk together, and in the isolation of the still night air of the last day of spring, poured out our hearts to one another in the messy, slightly confrontational, yet healing way that we have discovered solves our blockages of communication. We (gently, somehow) stomp, posture, accuse, and eventually come around to understand each other... and more importantly, we become ready to admit that we understand each other.

My last thread of rebellion and stubborness melted when he took my face in his hands, looked deep in my eyes, and said, "I get you, you know."

And he does. All my quirks, complications, baggage, moods and foibles. He gets me.

Somehow, this is bigger than the fact that he loves me. It is possible to love someone without understanding them... but infinitely better and more meaningful when someone sees you in all your imperfections, understands you better then you do yourself at times, and still loves you.

I am truly blessed to have him in my life.


XUP said...

Oh ya - "getting" someone and knowing they "get" you is the best thing ever. How nice that you both make the effort to work through issues and resolve them so beautifully.

Velda said...

ditto what XUP said *thumbs up!* ((hugs)) to both of you!

Janelle said...

Oh that just chokes me up, Susan. That's beautiful!

Yes, it is beyond wonderful to have someone in our lives who "gets" us ... even better if we "get" them, too, which we do!

Been through those messy, standoffish times myself. Kudos to you both for working your way through.

Susan said...

XUP: I think there are perhaps better, less confrontational ways to solve our issues, and we may yet find them, but this is what works for us. We seem to enter a sheltered bubble where we can spew all the things on our mind whether they're based on fact or not, and know that it's just an outlet, that it's not damaging anything. I think it's trust. I like it, whatever it is.

Velda: Thanks, darlin'.

Janelle: Thank you. Both of us hate to let things fester, so I think our little sessions clear the air and open the door for healing.

Reeky said...

14 years of marriage this past April. I understand the "getting it" part. My wife and I understand each other.

Might not always be on the same page but we understand why, when we don't jive. And we work it out.

kate said...

i read this entry and you reduce me to tears in seconds flat! My god you are truly blessed - we should all be so lucky.